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By Jennie Lindon

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Extra resources for Too Safe for Their Own Good

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Children need to see how to do something and be able to make a clear link between what you say and do. Give children an opportunity to do it themselves, as soon as you have completed ‘tell’ and ‘show’. Encourage them to ask for help as and when they want. Offer guidance as they wish. Children need plenty of active, hands-on practice and that adults handle any mistakes with good humour and understanding. For many skills this practice will be graded step by step, and children will move on to more challenging skills as they get older.

It is the adults’ responsibility to work to understand and show that they have grasped the children’s perspectives. Make sure that all the perspectives on the problem are heard. Consider with the children whether issues, concerns and then possible ways forward need to be recorded and, if so, in what ways. Perhaps a discussion starts because the adults feel the football game in the playground has become too rumbustious, not to mention the broken window. 28 | Too Safe For Their Own Good? ■ ■ ■ Perhaps the football players say that the playground offers them their only chance to play the game, and apologise about the window.

However, there are disadvantages to outright bans. ■ ■ ■ Children feel aggrieved, especially since bans are usually imposed without a proper discussion of alternatives. They are likely to feel that boring adults have stopped an activity important in their social world. The opportunity has been lost to take a problem-solving approach with children and for them to learn through being involved in this process. Even though parents voice serious concerns because their child has been hurt, many parents are increasingly unhappy about bans as a frontline approach to dealing with lively games or favourite play items for children.

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